Good morning. Today we begin to make a transition in the focus of the Commandments. The first 4 commandments dealt with our relationship with God. So these are the VERTICAL commands. But the second part of the 10 Commandments focus in more on our relationships with others. These are the HORIZONTAL commands.
We start the horizontal commands today with command # 5. Let’s go ahead and read that text this morning. Exodus 20:1-17. Now I can imagine that you have all got this whole passage memorized by now, but each week I want to read the whole text anyway. I think that many people, people who even go to church can’t remember the 10 Commandments or keep them in order. That is why each week I read over the entire text. So, Exodus, 20:1-17 says, “Ribbon”
Now with Kyle being gone today, this is a great commandment to be covering with the youth present. Now before we dig into today’s command, let’s open with a word of prayer.
There are some things that dad’s have taught their children:
Don’t ask me, ask your mother.
Keep your eye on the ball.
I’ll tell you why; because I said so, that’s why.
I’m not just talking to hear my own voice.
Two wrongs don’t make a right.
What did I just get finished telling you?
Don’t make me stop this car!
What part of “no” don’t you understand?
Now, some things that mom’s have taught their children:
If everyone else jumped off a bridge would you do it too?
If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.
If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they’re going to freeze that way.
What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you... Don’t talk back to me!
Just wait until your father gets home.
One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.
One day a little girl lost her last baby tooth, dad was weary of the Tooth Fairy and decided it was time to dispel this childhood myth. “Kelli,” he said, “You know how the Easter Bunny is really Mommy, and Santa Claus is, too?” “Yes,” she replied, a bit warily. “Well, there’s one more person who is really me. Can you guess who that is?” Slowly, Kelli’s eyes grew big as saucers and her mouth dropped open. In a small, awe-filled voice, she said, “God?”
God is invisible, and for children God has chosen to put parents in the visible place of authority over kids. Technically, you are God to your children right now. If you want to prepare your kids to obey GOD, who they can’t see, they’ve got to start by really learning well to obey YOU who they CAN see!
But our world today doesn’t value this commandment. When you watch TV shows, what are most parents like? They are portrayed as morons, idiots, too stupid to be cool. And that is what Hollywood programs into your kids from the time they are knee high!
Even when you do respect parents, it’s more of a “what I can get out of it” type of attitude. Like the bumper sticker I saw: “Honor your parents: they haven’t written their will yet.” You see, it should not be because you are getting something out of it, it should be out of love and to honor them like God has said to.
Let’s begin by taking a look at some practical application of this command.
First, practical application for children at home.
John Maxwell tells a story about 2 boys on their way to school, and they were talking about their families. One boy said, “I’ve figured out a SYSTEM for getting along with my MOM…. It’s very simple--- She tells me what to do….AND I DO IT!!!”
Kids, I have just given you the secret to a happy childhood. Obey your parents! Paul says in Ephesians 6:1, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
God’s word of wisdom to children is simple: Children, obey your parents in the Lord. It is a simple and straightforward word. Now I know this might be a shock to you, but children don’t always obey their parents! I heard of a mother who was asked by her 3 children what she would like for her birthday. She answered, “3 well-behaved children.” One of the children thought about her words for a moment and said, “Great! Then there will be 6 of us.”
Proverbs 6:20 says, “My son, observe the commandment of your father And do not forsake the teaching of your mother…”
And in Proverbs 23:22 it says, “Listen to your father who begot you, And do not despise your mother when she is old.”
Many of you think you know more than and are smarter than your parents, but you are not. You honor them by your obedience and respect for what they tell you. The only time we are justified in not obeying is if our parents tell us to do something that God has forbidden.
So you need to obey your parents. This is how you honor your parents when you are young and still in their care. You obey them and respect them. But it doesn’t end when you turn 18 or move out of the house. There certainly comes a time when we are no longer under our parents authority, when we establish our own households and we don’t live under their roof anymore. However, no matter what our age, since this is a timeless command, we are to treat our parents with high esteem. We are to treat them with the greatest care. We are to still honor them.
So here are some practical applications for adult children as well.
Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother. The first said, “I built a big house for our mother.” The second said, “I sent her a Mercedes with a driver.” The third smiled and said, “I’ve got you both beat. You remember how mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can’t see very well. Well I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He’s one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it.”
Soon thereafter, mom sent out her letters of thanks: “Milton,” she wrote one son, “The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house.” “Gerald,” she wrote to another, “I am too old to travel. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!” “Dearest Donald,” she wrote to her third son, “You have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious.”
Adults, it is not so easy with us. When we form our own household we are not under the authority of our parents as we once were. As we get older and our parents get older, our roles change. So what can adult children do to honor their parents?
First, appreciate them for what they have done. When we are younger we do not always appreciate the sacrifices our parents made for us so we could do things or wear certain clothes. We do not appreciate the time sacrifices and sometimes the career sacrifices that were made just for us. Thank them for the sacrifice and love they showed to you. This can be as simple as a phone call, a card, a letter, just let them know what they mean to you!
I have been involved in several funeral, and attended many others, and not once have I at the funeral of a father or mother, heard anyone say, “I wish I had spent less time telling them that I loved them and appreciated what they did for me.” Make sure they know that today. Don’t wait and then wish you had appreciated them more.
Second, honor your parents by valuing their advice.
Proverbs 13:1 says, “A wise son heeds his father’s instruction...”
Many times as a youth, your parent’s advice will seem old and out of date. You won’t want to follow their advice, because it seems stupid to you. But let me tell you, and I’m not that much older than most of you, but your parents are right more often than not. In the future, even when you get to my age, you will realize just how valuable their advice really was, let’s just hope that it isn’t too late for you to follow their advice. So honor them by listening to their advice.
Thirdly, honor your parents by helping meet their needs.
Make sure they are cared for when they can no longer do it for themselves. This is a time both children and parents hope never happens, but many times it does. Remember, they took care of you when it was not convenient. They loved you when it was hard to love you at times also. It may take sacrifice, but honor them by taking care of them and meeting their needs.
One of Grimm’s fairy tales tells of an old man who lived with his son, the son’s wife, and the young couple’s 4 year old boy. The old man’s eyes blinked, and his hands shook. When he ate, the silverware rattled against the plate, and he often missed his mouth. Then the food would dribble onto the tablecloth. This upset the young mother, because she didn’t want to have to deal with the extra mess and hassle of taking care of the old man. But he had nowhere else to live. So the young parents decided to move him away from the table, into a corner, where he could sit on a stool and eat from a bowl. And so he did, always looking at the table and wanting to be with his family but having to sit alone in the corner.
One day his hands trembled more than usual; he dropped his bowl and broke it. “If you are a pig,” they said, “then you must eat out of a trough.” So they made the old man a wooden trough and put his meals in it.
Not long after, the couple came upon their 4 year old son playing with some scraps of wood. His father asked him what he was doing. The little boy looked up, smiled, and said, “I’m making a trough, to feed you and Mamma out of when I get big.” Needless to say, the next day the old man was back at the table eating with the family, from a plate, and no one ever scolded him or mistreated him again.
I Timothy 5:8 says, “1”
This was the first Social Security. FDR didn’t invent social security, and it wasn’t supposed to be the government’s job! God laid out a plan for taking care of the elderly in a way that shows respect for them. Now I know there’s a lot of stress and expense involved in taking care of an elderly parent. I’m not saying it has to be in your home that you care for them. But honoring your parents means that you take care of them when they get too old to do so for themselves.
And finally, we need to honor our parents by forgiving their failings
Ephesians 4:26-27 says, “If you let the sun go down while you are still angry, the devil is going to have a foothold in your life.”
I know there are some of you here today thinking, “I am NEVER going to be able to honor HIM/HER. . . Not after what he/she’s done.”
I’m probably talking to some people whose parents have divorced, and left you hanging, fought, and you were caught in the middle, or maybe you have been abused, physically or emotionally. But let me tell you something, “Forgiveness is not a feeling. It is a choice to not hold on to anger or the desire for revenge.”
Some of you may have grown up in the homes of alcoholics or workaholics, abusive or neglectful parents, perhaps you had parents who were distant or cold and uncaring. And you want to cry out “how can I honor people who are un-honorable?” “How do I honor someone who never once honored me?”
What is it that God is asking of you this morning? Is God asking you to put on a mask and pretend it never happened? No, He is not. But He’s here this morning to ask you to take this step toward honoring your parents – forgive them and move on. Give up your right to hold bitterness and a desire for revenge. Give up your right to always think of them with anger on your heart. So to honor your parents, it is important that you forgive them. Then you can truly honor them.
So why is this command so important. Why is honoring our parents so important? Because parental honor lays the foundation for our attitude toward all authority figures in our lives. If we don’t learn the 5th commandment, then we’re going to have no foundation for the rest of the authority relationships in our lives. From the 5th commandment we learn how to relate to our boss, to our teachers, to our government, and so forth.
We often think an authority figure has to earn the right to be honored, and if we find an authority figure who’s imperfect or makes mistakes, we think we’re off the hook. But according to the Bible that’s not true; we’re still bound to honor authority in our lives even when that authority is imperfect.
Parents are God’s representative! They teach us all we need to make it in life. Jesus had parents, and even though He had authority over the wind and the waves, He still submitted to the authority and honored His parents. Parents, I hope that you realize the responsibility that you have to them and I hope that you take it seriously as well! Your job is not to make your kids happy, but to prepare them to be God-fearing, responsible adults. You are not off the hook when it comes to this command. You have a responsibility to raise them in a Godly way so that they can honor you.
A study once disclosed that if both Mom and Dad attend church regularly, 72% of their children remain faithful in attendance. If only Dad attends regularly, 55% remain faithful. If only Mom attends regularly, 15% remain faithful. And if neither parent attends regularly, only 6% remain faithful. Give them a future in the Kingdom of Heaven, give them a reason to honor you.
“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
This command is going to be easy for some of us and hard for others, but regardless; we are not exempt from it. Parents, you can make this command easy to follow by raising your children the way God expects you to do it. You can also make it easy by loving your children with love God has for them. There are a lot of bitter children in our society because these 2 things are not being done.
In conclusion we honor our parents because God loves us and we seek to love them as God has loved us. One thing is for certain we did not have perfect parents and we will not be perfect parents to our children, but all people have worth and need to be honored. So the command stands as honor your father and mother. That is the job of every child no matter what their age. And to the parents, again, give them a reason to honor you, and it won’t be so hard for them to do that.
Let’s Pray |
