Good morning. With today being Father’s Day, I wanted to share a little bit from the Men’s Thesaurus. You see, men don’t always say what they mean, ladies, please allow me to translate a few things for your future benefit.
When a man says “It would take too long to explain.” He means: “I have no idea how it works.”
When a man says “Take a break honey. You are working too hard.” He means: “I can’t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.”
When a man says “That’s interesting dear.” He means: “Are you still talking?”
When a man says “Can I help with dinner?” He means: “Why isn’t it ready yet?”
When a man says “Sure honey,” or “Yes dear.” He means: Absolutely nothing, it’s a conditioned response.
When a man says “You know how bad my memory is.” He means: “I can remember the score of the Super Bowl last year, the phone # to the pizza place, and a 100 other things, but yes, I forgot your birthday or anniversary.”
When a man says “I heard you.” He means: “I haven’t the foggiest clue what you just said and I am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you’ll not spend the next 3 days yelling at me.”
When a man says “You look terrific.” He means: “Oh please don’t try on one more outfit, we’re late and I’m starving.”
And finally, when a man says, “That’s not what I meant.” He means: “If something I said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, I meant the other one.”
Let me tell you one of my favorite jokes about fathers: One day a woman made the mistake of leaving her baby daughter in her husband’s care while she was busy doing some work in another room. He immediately buried himself in his newspaper, and forgot all about the baby until he heard a series of thumps, followed by a horrendous cry. Instantly he knew that the baby had fallen down the stairs. He called out to his wife, “Honey! Come quick! Our little girl just took her first 24 steps!”
Well, today is Father’s Day, as you have been reminded several times already this morning. So once again, “Happy Father’s Day” to all you dads who are here.
The Telephone Company tells us that Father’s Day is not the most popular day for long distance calls. Mother’s Day wins that prize hands down. Father’s Day doesn’t even come 2nd. Christmas does. Father’s Day comes in 3rd, and a distant 3rd at that. But Father’s Day is their greatest moneymaker because on this day more collect calls are made than on any other day of the year. So Happy Father’s Day!
In church, I guess, it’s almost the same way. Mother’s Day is a big day. Lots of people come. On Father’s Day the crowds are much smaller. On Mother’s Day preachers usually preach wonderful sermons about mothers and their sacrifices and all that they have done for their kids. And everybody leaves with a warm fuzzy feeling.
But on Father’s Day some preachers tend to unload on dads about not fulfilling their responsibilities and so on. In fact, one dad went to church on Father’s Day and when he left the service he said, “Wow, if this is Father’s Day, then the first day of deer season ought to be called “Deer Day.””
Well, that’s not my intention this morning guys. I don’t want to make this a bad day for dads. So let’s talk about the positive aspects of fatherhood. And to do that, I call your attention to the familiar story of the prodigal son, and especially to the father of the prodigal son.
He’s a good father. In fact, he’s a perfect father, because as Jesus tells the story, He is picturing our Father who is in Heaven. So, this morning I want you to notice 5 characteristics of this father. Go ahead and turn with me to Luke 15:11-32. Here in this passage it says, “1”
First, Notice That He Provided For The Basic Needs Of His Family.
The father in the story of the prodigal son was fairly well to do. He had an estate. He had an inheritance for his son that was large enough so that his son could enjoy an extravagant lifestyle for a period of time. He had enough money so that he could put a ring on his son’s finger and kill the fatted calf and put a robe on his shoulders and have a big party of celebration when he came home.
We have always recognized, especially on Father’s Day, that part of the job of every father is to provide for his family, to make sure there is food on the table, shelter over their heads, and clothing on their backs.
Paul writes in I Timothy 5:8, “If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” So it is the man’s job, as fathers, to provide.
The U.S. Department of Agriculture conducts a survey every year to determine the cost of living. They study the spending of 5,000 families to find out how much it costs to raise children in this country. The findings are interesting.
The latest figures I have indicate that if you’re in the average family of their survey, making about $60,000 a year and raising 2 children, it costs you about $11,972 per child per year. And as they get older, it gets more expensive. By the time your child is a teenager, he or she will be costing you $13,253 per year.
Now add that all up, and by the time a child reaches 18 or gets out of high school, you will have spent $223,860 per child, and that doesn’t include any expenses for college.
So if you’re critical of your dad because you thought he didn’t provide enough for you; or you thought you didn’t have all the opportunities other kids had; or you thought you didn’t have the clothes you wanted, or you thought you didn’t go to all the places you wanted to go, you may want to pause this Father’s Day and say, “Thanks, Dad. Thanks for being a good provider.”
Secondly, This Father Was Generous Beyond What Could Reasonably Be Expected. Listen to verses 11 and 12. “Jesus continued, “There was a man who had two sons. The younger son said to his father, “Father, give me my share of the estate.” So he divided his property between them.””
Now if you put that into contemporary language, it would go something like this. Here’s a boy, maybe 18, 19, or 20, who comes to his dad and says, “Dad, I’ve calculated it all out and I’ve come to the conclusion that when you die I’m going to inherit about $250,000. Well, I want my share now. I don’t want to have to wait until you die. Give it to me now!”
Today, a father would probably just laugh at his son and tell him to go away. But to our great surprise, the father gives it to him. That’s exceeding generosity. And we would tend to question his wisdom. But I think the father probably knew some things that we don’t know.
He knew that his son was going to the far country anyway. He knew there were lessons his son had to learn on his own. He knew what was best for those who stayed behind. So he gave him his inheritance. Now that’s generosity!
Has your dad been generous to you? Does or did he provide food and clothing and shelter for you? Is he generous with his time? Does he talk with you and share with you?
Erma Bombeck wrote this about her dad: “My Daddy just didn’t know how to show love. It was Mom who held the family together. He just went to work every day and when he came home she had a list of sins we’d committed, and he would give us what-for about them.
I broke my leg once on a swing set. It was Mom who held me in her arms all the way to the hospital. Dad pulled the car right up to the emergency door and when they asked him to move it because the space was reserved for emergency vehicles, he shouted, “What do you think this is, a tour bus?” Mom carried me in while Dad parked the car. It seems all my life Dad was parking the car someplace, coming in wet and half-frozen.
Dad was always sort of out of place. At birthday parties he just busied himself blowing up balloons, setting up tables and running errands. But it was Mom who carried the cake with the candles on it for me to blow out.
I remember when Mom told him to teach me how to ride a bicycle. I told him not to let go, but he said it was time. So I fell, and Mom ran to pick me up. But he waved her off. I was so mad that I showed him. I got right back on that bike and rode it by myself. He didn’t even feel embarrassed. He just smiled.
When I went off to college he was just fiddling with the luggage and the boxes. It was Mom who sat down and said that everything would be all right. She did all the writing. He just sent checks and a little note about how great his lawn looked now that I wasn’t playing football on it.
When I got married it was Mom who got choked up and cried, and Dad just blew his nose loudly and left the room.
All my life he kept saying, “What are you doing? What time are you going to be home? Do you have gas in the car? Who’s going to be there? No, you can’t go.” Not Mom, she just loved me. But Daddy, he just didn’t seem to know how to show love, unless, is it possible that he was showing it all along, and I just didn’t recognize it?”
Well, has your dad been generous to you? Then say to him, “Thanks, Dad.”
Thirdly, This Dad Gave His Sons Space When It Was Appropriate.
He gave each of them space to be his own person. “Not long after that,” it says in verse 13, “the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living.”
The hardest thing to do is to turn your children loose, right? Remember the first day of school when you walked them to the bus stop and watched them get on? Remember when they went to camp for the first time and were gone all week long? Remember when they drove for the first time without you in the car with them, and you were so afraid? Remember when they went to college and you left them at the dormitory? Remember when you walked your daughter down the aisle and gave her to a man you knew was not good enough for her? Those are tough times in parenting.
Gary Ezell says that there are 4 stages in parenting:
The first stage is “Discipline” - from birth to age 5. This is when you set rules and draw the guidelines and say, “This is right and this is wrong. This is good and this is bad.” And if you don’t do that in the first 5 years you probably won’t be able to do it at all.
The second stage is “Training” – ages 6-12. Training time is when you’re setting the example. You become the role model. You show them how to dress themselves, to tie their shoes, and cut their meat and so on. It’s a training time when you’re actually modeling for them, and they’re watching you.
The third stage is “Coaching” – ages 13-19. During this phase the child is actually in the game and you’re the coach on the sidelines. You’re not playing the game for them, they’re playing it themselves. You may call time out. You may huddle up. You may send in some plays, but you’re the coach and they’re the players.
And the last stage, the fourth stage, is “Friendship” – from sometime around 20 throughout the rest of your life you just become good friends. You walk together, and talk together, and remember together, and laugh together. You have turned them loose to become the person God created them to be.
So if you have, or had, a father, who was wise enough to turn you loose and let you become the person God created you to be, then say, “Thanks, Dad,” today.
Fourthly, This Father Was Willing To Forgive A Serious Offense And Move On.
Let’s continue on with the story in verse 14, “After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need.”
This was evidently the first time in that boy’s life that he had ever been in need. Always before, his father had provided for him. But now he is hungry and cold and homeless. Verse 15 says, “So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs.”
Now, feeding pigs is about the lowest job on the farm. And if you were a Jewish boy who had been brought up to believe that pigs were unclean, then this was the lowest task imaginable. Jesus is telling the story that way so that we’ll see that this boy has come from the highest high to the lowest low.
Continuing on in verses 16 and 17, “He longed to fill his stomach with the pods the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. So when he came to his senses, he said, “How many of my father’s hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death””
This is when the child says, “Duh,” and a light bulb comes on in his brain and he says, “This doesn’t make sense. I left home because I thought Dad’s rules were too strict. I left home because I didn’t like it there. I left home thinking that life on my own would be much better. But here I am, hungry, and feeding pigs. This is about as bad as it can get.”
So it says that he set out to go back to his father and say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired men.” (Verses 18-19)
Notice that word, “make.” Here’s the big difference. Before his experience in the hog lot the boy was constantly saying to his dad, “Give me! Give me what is mine. I want what is mine. Give me my inheritance now.”
Now he is ready to go home and say, “Make me.” Everybody needs to travel that road. When you finally graduate from saying to God, “Give me!” all the time, to the place where you’re saying, “God, make me into the kind of person you want me to be,” then you have graduated to where God can begin to mold you and make you into what you ought to be.
“So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him” (Verse 20)
Isn’t that a great scene? Just think about it. Here is this son, this rebellious son, coming back home again. If you or I had been his father, we probably would have given him an earful. “You’re an embarrassment to the family! You’re a failure.” But no, the father Jesus was telling about, while his son was still a long way off, saw him, ran to him, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
And while the son is saying to his father, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son,” the father is saying to his servants, “Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.” So they began to celebrate.” (Verses 21-24)
It’s tough to be that forgiving, isn’t it? Maybe, on this Father’s day it would be a good thing to say once again, “Thanks, Dad for being so forgiving.”
And Finally This Morning, Notice That He Loved His Sons Equally, Even Though He Handled Them Differently.
“Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. “Your brother has come,” he replied, “and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.” The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him.” (Verses 25-28)
Now the situation is very different, isn’t it? The 2 sons are very different. One stays and does the everyday tasks. The other one has this wild streak in him and goes to the far country. They are very different boys. So you cannot handle them in the same way. You love them the same, but you handle them in different ways.
“But he answered his father, “Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!””
“My son,” the father said, “you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”” (Verses 29-32)
When you look at your own lives. You may not handle your kids the same way, but you love them equally. Your parents probably did the same. Today, you need to be able to say, “Thanks, Dad.”
Now, as I close this morning, let me share one last story with you. Doug Flutie, NFL quarterback, has an autistic son who can’t speak, who is severely handicapped. Doug Flutie once said, “I would give up all my successes on the ball field if my son could just look at me and say, “Dad.” If he could just say that one word. If he could just say, “Dad.””
I wonder, sometimes, if God doesn’t think about some of us that way? Is He looking down and saying, “If only my children would recognize me and realize that I’m their Father!”
No matter what kind of earthly father you all had, we all have a Heavenly Father that loves us very much. He’s taken care of our basic needs. He is generous beyond expectations. He has given us space to be our own selves. He has forgiven us over and over again. And He loves us all equally, even though we are very different. I’m thankful that I have a heavenly Father like that. Are you?
Let’s say to our earthly father’s today, and especially to our Heavenly Father, “Thanks Dad!”
Let’s Pray |
